Snow Fall

As I look outside, snow blankets my neighborhood. I've taken my pain pill, so a sense of calm slowly starts to take hold. I've found that my life seems to revolve around my pain medication. My mood, my pain, my sleep, all depend on these pills that only partially deliver on their promise. When the hydrocodone wears off, I waken, both mentally and painfully.

I don't like this phase of life. I'm simply putting in time, with such a small return on all the effort. I walk to exercise my legs, and try to focus on the future. In doing so, I'm ignoring the present. Sometimes it's just to hard to handle the day to day, and I want to curl up in a warm blanket til this is all done. I know this is childish, but for now that's my coping mechanism.

love

Cj