Thanksgiving

This has been a difficult year to say the least, yet I find myself thankful for so much. I have a wife who puts up with me through thick and thin, and two daughters who make me realize that there are more important things than my own wants and desires. I have a sister and brother-inlaw who are as supportive as can be in the midst of their own pain.

I have two sets of parents who love me no matter what I do, who support me in word and deed. Who set an example I always strive to follow, yet never quite attain.

I have brothers and stepbrothers, aunts and uncles, cousins and neighbors who are pulling for me, urging me to keep my chin up even when things seem darkest.

I have friends who listen when I need to talk, and talk when I need to hear a familiar voice.

The last 6 months have changed my family in innumerable ways. The loss of Rachel and my illness have brought us closer than ever, and broken down barriers that had built up over time. The other day I debated with myself whether I would enter into a faustian bargain. If my cancer was the price to pay for bringing my family closer together, would I pay the piper? Would I go through the pain and fear that has haunted me since July? I was never able to come up with an answer. Fortunately, that's a decision I don't have to make. I wish I could go back and do things differently, but I can't. The outcome wouldn't be much different.

love,

Cj