Skinny Me

Funny how you become accustomed to your own skin. In high school I weighed a stout 150lbs. For a 6'3" guy, just imagine Dachau. But that was me. As I got older, and stopped being a basketball junkie, my weight began to rise, to a peak of 220 or so. This was the new me, and though I didn't like being out of shape, I liked being bigger.

Yet cancer had different plans for me. Between surgery and chemo, I'm back down to around 175lbs. Not bad actually for my height, if I was in shape. But I'm not. My legs and my posterior (what's left of it) are so weak and skinny. Each round of chemo seems to knock me down about ten pounds, and I gain 5-6 of it back during my recovery week. So after I finish my chemo I'll probably be back down to my high school weight. Irony is so much fun.

But there is light at the end of the tunnel. My wonderful eating habits are in such flux, that there's a chance that I can put the weight back on in a healthier fashion. I'd love to end up at 180lbs, with a six pack for abs. But who am I kidding. I just don't want to look like the guy rescued from Dachau.

love,

Cj